yes, today was nice, today was as usual, today was okay. i just stopped thinking baout everything, and enjoyed today. it took me abit of effort, but hell, i should indeed stop thinking about all this, pretend i dont even know those people, forget all the weird stuff we said, and just get out of the way and let them do whatever they wat. i am indeed a girl who cant do much, so noelle, just get lost.

went out in the morning to shop.. far east plaza.. was looking for a mini-jacket, but i wasnt paying attention.. wasnt 'warmed up'.. so i didnt notice all the nice mini jackets there were. went to this bread place for lunch.. it wasnt fantastic, but it was way interesting. at wisma.. went to forever 21, went walking around.. until my aunt saw this shop, and saw this nice spaghetti strap shirt going for ten bucks, and i HAD to get it.. then went to zara, guess, mango, fox, almost every clothes shop la.. was still looking for my jacket, so we went back to far east and re-searched the basement level. bought an orange mini jacket with a(nother) spag strap shirt for 24 bucks. worth it.. compared to that jacket in giordano i wanted.

went to raffles place to walk around.. had tea there.. it was heavenly. we had this fudge brownie (hot) with the nicest vanilla ice cream, and when you ate it together it was just simply great. the brownie was the B-E-S-T. had this cup of brilliant hot chocolate too. initially we were planning to go to the esplanade to DRINK CHOCOLATE (there was a choice of dark, milk and white choc. yum. like gulping down MELTED CHOCOLATE. heavenly too.), but in the end we were to lazy to walk there or something.

bought myself a COACH wallet, it would have cost a few hundred bucks for that small piece of canvas and leather and metal.. and my auntie bought two louis vuitton wallets, each would be over a few hundred bucks.. but SOMEHOW, we didnt even have to pay a tenth of that price.. it looks so bloody nice and impressive, and its BRANDED SHIT.

then went driving around, and ate at this hawker centre with the nicest popiah in singapore..

yes, indulging myself in food (its a sheer luxury) is a good way to get away from 'the real world' (and what it brings with it). even though it means working out and even more dieting.. yes, i am growing fat. everytime i stare at myself in the mirror i actually wish i could be skinnier.. its just disheartening to see people with great bodies walking around yet not appreciating it.. while people like me can only wish that we had all the kilos off our bodies. *yes, noelle shall not eat out for this week, since im broke and im dieting.*

and now im back at my auntie's house.. thinking, staring blankly at the computer screen. wishing that my auntie will bring out the alchohol and i shall drink. drink and get drunk (no, im joking), and wake up tomorrow and throw up. i havent touched alchohol in a long time.. not even a sip from my parent's glasses. drinking alchohol without getting drunk is a great skill to have.. and maybe i should train on that tonight.. and ill be weird tomorrow morning. haha.. YES, i shall go and ask her when she comes out of the toilet..

shall wait for the phone to ring.
byeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee.

last night/this morning was crazy, but it's over.. so i guess i should stop harping on it. it does take alot of guts for a girl to do such things you know? i have to thank one person though.. thanks samad.. even though i partly dragged you into this mess, you listened to me the whole night, you understood me.. youre a true friend i guess.. thank you.

one more last thing: i hope shaun doesnt know.. i know hes always been oblivious to this kind of thing.. didnt all this start PARTLY bcus of shaun?

hey shaun, its only the first day but i can feel the atmosphere without you here is different.. no one chionging on the ps2 every morning, no one cracking weird jokes, no one telling me about how their friends are.. no one to do crazy stuff with at home. i sure hope you'll enjoy your UK trip..

i'll wait till my aunty comes home from the temple then we'll head out shopping.. i just want to assume this neutral mood today, so i hope no one minds..

all i want is for people around me to stop playing 'pass the parcel' with blame, and really start thinking about what they've done so far.. and just forgive each other for whatever misunderstandings, differences and whatever happened. i know im not in the position to say all this, bcus i only know like 1/10 of whats going on.. but cant we all just ive simply and be happy? why the hell do you think i did this? its not like its the greatest thing in the world. but then again, noelle should just shut up as she is being told, cause she doesnt know a thing, and cant do a thing to help, and should just sit there and get screamed at for whatever reasons. well, everyone seems to think its plain smooth sailing for me now.. so i shall let them think whatever they want. besides, the damage is already done, and i HAVE chosen my path.. what can i do but beg for forgiveness and search for other solutions? *which i actually have done, but everyone seems too heated up to listen.. but then again nothing noelle comes up with is feasible..* where are all the nice people that always smile at me and try to get me into the conversation? what the hell happened that made such coldness, hardness, and unfriendliness? cant you all see that youre just bringing each other down by being like this? oh, yeah, scold me if you want, i just have to get this out, and i do deserve the scolding, so bring it on, and scold until you cant anymore, and then start doing something about the problem, and dont just blame people.


well, this sucks.

yes, i hate myself now. why did i start all this mess? i should have expected all along that i would be the one to end this relationship. i was a burden, and i did cause trouble, and i affected friendships. I deserve the fate i have now, crying my heart out on tissue, having eyes like a zombie, with a more or less dead heart, sitting in this chair unable to sleep, and well, other side effects. not that i want it, but it is needed.. don't blame anyone but me, it's me who did all this. thanks for all the fun times, thanks for the times shared, thanks for the opportunity; i have a never-ending list. it sucks when i have to undergo misery to make life easier for others, but i still do care, so that's why i'm doing this. everything will blow over soon, ive only been a friend to you all along, nothing more, so it won't suck that much i guess.. im so fucking sorry everyone.

i have 111 posts, excluding this. a great accomplishment. whoohoo. im now sitting in this big nice chair, sipping my nice hot milo. ^_^ in this nice cozy house which belongs to my AUNT. whee. shall be staying up LATE LATE. haha.

erm.. today.. went to send shaun off.. but i left early.. to go and watch a movie with nick, eugene, samad.. and weiqiang followed us for lunch.. i skipped lunch: 1. i was broke. 2. i put on WEIGHT. (yeah, there was this weighing machine for luggages at the airport, and me and ines were weighing ourselves.. cute.. erm. without all my barang baran im around 44kg. big BIG weight increase.) erm. then td came along.. i dont really wna talk about the whole thing, it was fun, yes, but it wasnt the most ENJOYABLE ever, but i didnt regret it as much as i originally thought i would.

well, it had its good and bad points, i suddenly OPENED my eyes bigger, and i noticed that things and the people around me werent as easy as i thought. *i had fun trying on glasses which made me look like a NERD.. with samad. he's such a weird nice person.*

yep, we all went our separate ways, nick, eugene and joe (he popped up before the movie) left.. i had my 'dinner' at BK with samad and td, then td left.. so it was just me and sam. weird combination. wanted to go walk around shopping with him, but i had to go home.. O_O

YES- i did find out a couple of things: 1. all of them are scary. 2. samad is scary but nice. 3. guys do indeed have mood swings. 4. guys sometimes have their friendship problems worse than girls and their bitching. 5. guys are not as shallow and dumb as they appear to be. 6. it rocks alot to find someone who has similar interests. 7. i am a very anti-social person to those i dont know well. 8. i reconfirmed myself that i CANT wear rimmed specs. 9. i do need a hug badly.

i shall return home from here on SUNDAY.. so its shopping all the way tomorrow. WHEEEEEEE. okay. shall go surfing and abuse the computer. no, im joking. haha. yeah well, im gonna enjoy my milo. BYEEEEEEEEEEEEEE.

'ALL WOMEN ARE PRINCESSES; IT IS OUR RIGHT'

i spent a many good minutes thinking this out yesterday afternoon, while sitting on that chair and staring out at the seven guys playing badminton, sweating everything out. I am a princess, i will always be one to my family, yet sometimes, i feel as if i don't deserve the title. PRINCESSES ONLY DESERVE THE BEST; but what if the best is not what we want? And of course, with my spoilt ways, i often abuse my princess authority. I don't want the best anyway, haha.

okay. what was i doing staring at people playing badminton? well, i accompanied shaun, since i didnt wna be left alone at home.. well, who went: nick, shaun, td, joe (nick's friend?), eugene, samad, weiqiang, and me. imagine how extra-ed i was feeling. O_O well, if it wasnt for my quietness, i was pretty happy the whole afternoon, main reason being, well, Samad. When he came into the hall he was like: 'Heey Noellee' and this big weird smile of his. And i didn't even know samad, so his sheer friendliness sent me abit off my rocker. Ahha. And weiqiang kept trying to talk to me, bcus maybe he felt i was ABIT too quiet. Yes, not all guys are gloomy and 'cool' (i mean quiet and poser-ish), some are so friendly that it scares me sometimes.

I mean, i AM a girl stuck in a badminton hall with seven guys that i don't know well, except maybe two or three, and of course i went into the quiet and shy mood. I'm not one who interacts easily with guys. *Except a FEW again..* I've been in a more-or-less GIRL environment for eight years laready, since Primary one, and i do need time to adjust, *even though i must say that the change of environment is quite refreshing and enjoyable.*

Well, i hadn't planned on playing with them, i just sat and observed certain people. But suddenly, this weird 4 vs 4 plan came up, and they had seven people, so they wanted me in. They were separating themselves into two groups, Mask Riders and Power Rangers? Imagine me: WTF. Then weiqiang said to me: "You're a Power Ranger Noelle, it's in your blood." GOSH. FUNNY. WEIRD. LAME. RETARDED. but still funny. haha. So in the end i joined (i didnt want to decline and be rude you know..), but the crazy 4 vs 4 plan never became reality, so HAHA. But i did end up playing doubles against Shaun and WQ, and i partnered Samad. The other four THRASHED it out on the other court. It was fun i guess.. the whole episode covered everything including "WALAU", "paiseh", "CHIONG AH (by shaun)" to HARD GAY (shaun's doing again) and many other weird happenings.

Was telling Shaun that all his friends are weird. He had to agree. But i'm weird too.. the one person we agreed on that wasn't weird was my maid, my dear Aunty Lucy. Yeah, not that i don't know her well, but she's sane and calm and brave and truthful to herself, and to God. Well, the scene when we were talking about this weirdness was also weird (sounds confusing?), since there was one barefooted person, a few people randomly lying down and getting up, but it was just funny to me.

Rushed off to BALLETTT.. erm. class was normal, QUITE.. except that many people were teasing me.. bcus.. haha. shant tell. AND, the worst thing happened. WORST. Well, i've developed calf muscles, which Ms Kok says that it spoils the line of my leg (ballet words, i dont think many will understand). ARGH, BULGING LEG MUSCLES. She (my tcher) could tell that i've been running. Well, i HAVE, not serious running, but exercising, and doing many sports.. >.< shit. And obviously i didnt stretch after whatever i did, bcus muscles developed quickly. EWW. UGLY. I HAVE FAT AND UGLY LEGS. ARGH. Yeah, and MARTIN- the weird pianist- was also telling me about it.. he was teasing, but i took it seriously. EWW. Shit. For the sake of ballet, i shall slack more and stretch ALOTT. SLACK, stay at home, and SLACK.

Rehearsal was quite okay.. mr litao was being such a rainbow as usual. (rainbow= gay= faggot= whatever la. so many things to call a homosexual nowadays.) YEAH, but i have to say he entertains me all the time. And yes, i do enjoy his funny rehearsals.. with the exception of my bleeding blisters and a few more newly developed ones. After seeing blood on my stockings (again) i decided to go off POINTE and just wear ballet flats (sorry for the overuse of ballet language.) I went home looking extremely obscene. Like, i was wearing my stockings, and my uberr short shorts. So imagine how many people were staring at my legs. Urgh. OBSCENITY.

I'm not going for rehearsal today.. im dead already. Couldnt sleep last night bcus my whole body seemed to ache. Ive been seriously dancing five days in a row, and coming home late, and whatever la. Just cannot DAHAN anymore. Even lying on my bed hurts. *I actually slept on the floor last night.* NOELLE, this holiday is meant to be a holiday, so stop working so hard or you'll drop dead. Yes, i do need a massage. Maybe i should be a cheapo and sit on the Osim chair pretending to be a customer. And i'll get my FOC service. WHOOHOO.

I'm actually pretty not happy now.
Yes, i do need a hug badly..

im changing my blogskin before i update. i realise i really do need a 'scrolldown' blogskin, bcus my long posts are hard to read on these mini clickclick blogskins.

urgh. ines types as fast as a sloth moves. or maybe even ""faster"". im changing my blogskin later, and then i have my class from 6-830pm, and my rehearsal from 730-930pm. and of course im leaving class halfway..

yesterday's rehearsal: horrible, tiring, stinky, blazing hot, emotional, unmotivated
tiring for me, stinky bcus of everyone's sweat, blazing hot bcus i felt that i was locked in a sauna with a whole load of sweating girls which added on to the heat, emotional because everyone was getting pissed, unmotivated- well thats pretty obvious, everyone was tired. IT WAS THREE LONG HOURS. AND I WAS EN POINTE. IN MY BRAND NEW SUPER STIFF AND HARD POINTE SHOE. ive added on a few more blisters to the collection on my feet. and the old blisters suddenly burst into life again and were bleeding. so i have like.. five blisters now? ah. and my toes are still numb, my feet are aching, no, actually im aching everywhere. IM GROWING OLD..

and fyi: dancers have ugly feet, the pointe shoe makes their feet worse, but makes them look all the more perfect and amazing and graceful and beautiful on the outside. the shoe is just a facade, a mask. the shoe is just a little tool that we use to destroy ourselves yet make ourselves look pretty. and we have to make it look terribly easy.. so theres that little inside info on dancers.

ines, my grandma and my maid are heading to jurong bird park today. and me and shaun shall slack at home.. well actually, shaun's going off to play badminton at three, so i guess i'll follow him. i dont like to be alone at home and lock up all the windows and doors.. but the thing is, he's going back to school at one or two, so.. i think i'll go out and meet him at three. and then i shall watch him and his friends play. ^_^

ines shall update when she comes back. i shall make it a routine for her. i mean, all she does is slack in front of the tv.. (i think its terrible and unhealthy,) so i guess this is her homework. shaun's blog is lagging terribly.. i just hope he updates before he flies off to UK. speaking of that, hes not really keen on me sending him off.. he said i can follow in the car, and after that he'll throw me back into the car. how cool. i think i have the right to do what i want now, i have the right as a human, as his sister, and as a friend. erm, but if he doesnt like it then i shant do anything. >.<

for lunch.. me and shaun shall head down/up to the kitchen and COOK. whee. first time we cook together. O_O yeah.. hes planning something easy, like fried rice or something.. i'll do lettuce and some other side dish? but of course, that was just something we talked over yesterday, we havent really decided, i think it was more of us assuring our grandma that we wouldnt starve. but of course we had to say that since both of us were to lazy to walk out and buy something.. since our house is so in-the-middle-of-nowhere. *correction: middle of this big housing estate.*

well, yesterday, shaun was wonding out loud who HARD GAY was.. once i heard the words, i just burst out laughing. well you see, our dear cousin, hongzai, or chris or whatever i call him, came visiting the previous day when i wasnt around.. and he was so INTO hard gay.. i think he was acting like him or singign the hard gay song.. BTW, my cousin's real cool, he has the latest technology, he seems to be enjoying his rate of life, he likes playing with us kids, he talks to us alot (sometimes my mum asks him to do so, bcus she doesnt feel comfortable saying it to us, issues like: me, shaun, shaun's attitude.. whatever), and hes still going on strong SINGLE, and.. hes in his thirties already.. old. HAHA. yeah, so back to hard gay. i first knew hard gay at.. td's place, where he showed me a video of him. it was disturbing for ME, at first, but now i just simply love hard gay.

HARDO GEII- is this jap comedian who acts gay, and goes around helping people and doing weird stuff. the kids in japan just simply love him, although i felt that parents shouldnt let their kids so close to such a character.

so when shaun was wondering.. i just showed him the first video i saw of him, trying to improve business of this ramen shop. into the first ten seconds, he was already laughing his head off. like he was laughing and laughing and laughing and laughing... and laughing. okay, so in my absense (i went off to ballet), it seems shaun became a fellow lover of hard gay, *alongside with my cousin, me, td, and the diehard fan, weiqiang. ^_^ and of course many other youtubers all over the world.* he was watching the Hard gay visiting Yahoo! video. way weird. hey, go check it out on youtube, its quite cool. and shaun was trying hard to download hard gay's song. its just funny shit.

okay, going to have my breakfast, see the people off, and watch shaun play. ^_^

good morning.
sewing my pointe shoes now. broke my nail. ouch. trying to download songs, but my limewire's abit cranky today. can't search. >.< ah well. hmm. today i have my rehearsal from 2-5. and my ballet class at 545-7 something? yeah. so i'll be gone the whole day too. except now of course.
ive decided, i DO need guitar lessons. where? dont know. HOW TO PAY? dont know. when? dont know. WHY? bcus i need to improve. DUH. what? its an ACOUSTIC GUITAR. lame shit. okay. lets continue. ... im not considering yamaha, cause its expensive. ^_^"
shaun's leaving this friday, and i'll probably send him off, and while he's gone, i'm going to spend a weekend over at my auntie's place. its either this weekend or next weekend. still deciding.. but i think this weekend's better. of course i have a reason.. but its secret. well well. no one needs to know anyway.
okay, i have to say im in love with hip hop and r&b. its abit poser-ish, but i like it, its nice to dance to, so too bad if you think its weird. *of course i still love my rock, and pop and japanese songs.*
i cant wait till im sixteen. i have to wait another two and a half years before i attain that age. i cant stand great movies with the little NC16 sign at the corner. it really pisses me off. AND, my mum says that i can date when im sixteen, not that im greatly looking forward to it, O_O, but its a greater form of freedom i guess. and i love freedom. and not that i want to date badly either, so dont go thinking too much. ah well. i shall wait. wait impatiently. by the time im sixteen i'll probably wish im eighteen anyway. LOL. but theres also a small part of me wishing to be a little girl again. and be innocent and petty and generally cute. >.<
anyway, yesterday was quite an unlucky day, i tripped and choked alot. i choked on my lunch, this stupid piece of meat.. grr. and i popped this gummie into my mouth, and i think i laughed or something, and the gummie went down my throat without me chewing and all. and i couldnt cough it up, so i had to force it down. ouch. poor throat. not to mention the countless times i choked on my water. and i tripped over everything. wires, humps, everything. even walking on a straight smooth terrain made me fall. is this a sign that the GUY UP THERE is trying to send me? ah. i might just die any moment. i might just choke myself to death on the water im drinking now. well, i am what i am. i am what certain people describe me as. i am just simply GONG. ^_^" and careless, and blur, and everything else.
i have to add on to my material wants soon, when i have the time. its like everytime i see soemone with that SOMETHING, i just go: i want that. not that i really NEED that, but its a nice little piece of technology (or some plain little piece of clay) that would make entertaining myself easier. something such as that bird whistle at suntec. and a proper working phone with all the proper working functions of a modern phone. and a new wallet which shouts NOELLE'S STYLE all over it. and a new thick liquid eyeliner to make up for my broken one. ^_^" well.
girls (like noelle here)= time + money + loads of effort + sincerity + well, almost everything.
to sum it up, girls like me, are a waste of precious material. we look at worth, and at FASHION. of course, im not like that anymore, but sometimes that girly feel just comes back, and i become this fickle-minded and shallow girl. haix. noelle is just a plain waste. ^_^"
okay. and now, noelle looks like a MINAH- malay ah lian, a MALAY (in general), an INDONESIAN, and i just basically dont look like a chinese. sometimes i scare people by just simply speaking mandarin. well, looks are deceiving. actually, my looks can pass me off as almost anything, it just depends on what i dress as. O_O oh, my mum says that me and shaun have natural eyebags, inherited from her. so when i put on eyeliner, its scary. but nvm, i like looking like a zombie, so what?
haha. long post. ^_^. im going to eat my breakfast, my late breakfast.. okay.
BYEEE.

OHAYO.
im pH10 this morning. very good start for today.
why? ask the GUY UP THERE SITTING AND LOOKING DOWN AT US.
ah. which basically means: noelle doesnt know. (or she doesnt want to say)
the bracket-ed choice is the most accurate. ^_^
im on deviantart surfing around for nice pictures. i can never seem to get enough of them. even though it chokes my up computer storage space. ah. who cares. my hard disk space only so little, i should go get a new one. mohoho.
my internet's on high today. think it took some ecstacy pills or something. one minute the signal received is EXCELLENT, the next is very low or NO SIGNAL. bahh. also need an upgrade on that. hoho. but i dont care. as long as this chunk of metal, rubber, and plastic works, i dont really care.
just received my phone top-up card. its like twenty bucks? and each sms is 5 cents, so it'll give me 300 smses for eighteen dollars, and the remaining two dollars are for emergency calls even though my phone cant call/received calls. doesnt make sense, i know, but im weird.
dont know what to do with my guitar. it sits there, i stare at it, i put on my lap and strum. but after a while i dont know what to play on it, and i get pretty frustrated, and i put it away on my bed. ^_^" mood-swinging girl.
have yet to start sewing the tip of my two pairs of pointes. O_O cant bear to start. I NEED FABRIC GLUE, then i'll just paste it on. makes my life easier. lazy i am, but creative i am too. ^_^ doesnt make sense again.
okay. shall go grab some breakfast and go watch shaun play his ps2.
BYEBYEE DARLINGS.

DUMDEEDUM. IM HOME. finally. heheh. DANCED TILL IM GIDDY. wheeee. no, im not happy. im just feeling 'dont know what to feel', so i just started being chirpy and wacky. had rehearsal at SIX? i totally forgot about it until some people reminded me. they were asking what i was going to do from three something to six. DANG. thought i could go home and sew my pointes. >.<
okay.. so rehearsal was OKAY. erm. i screwed up LOADS, but i didnt really care. was feeling giddy and tired the whole time. bah. i think ms lee doesnt like me anymore. >.< size="4"> since im such an attention seeker. in fact, i like anyone who likes me for who i am. cant help it. yeah. *so i think ms lee has stopped liking me bcus of the "BF THING", which i am still strongly denying, but no one believes me, so i shall just tell myself that ive done nothing wrong and no one can find proof against me. HAH.* ms lee was pretty pissed the whole rehearsal, and she kinda took it out on us.. but i guess its also natural for her, since she IS a TEACHER. cant blame her. can only be angry at her, but i'll feel guilty after that, so i shall just remain emotionless regardless of what she does.
okay. im partly like this bcus i was thinking on the bus back home. i just thought of the weirdest things.. and in those minutes in the bus, i had already planned out how i want my birthday to be. weird? THATS ME FOR YOU. my birthday doesnt have to be those that gets half the school gossiping and inviting people you dont really know, but you THINK theyre popular and all. *i never EVER want such a party. those are mainly reserved for the popular bitches who care about nothing but their looks, whats the latest, and everyone's bfs. which i think is IMMATURE, and such stated bitches should just be ashamed of themselves and jump off a building to save themselves from the embarassment.* i just want a simple outing with the people i love. too ordinary, but i think its the most meaningful to me. and its not something my parents would not not approve of.. so its more or less perfect *for me.*
well. some of you MIGHT be wondering.. why is noelle online? YOU SEE, her parents have gone out without her AGAIN, to some pub or bar to celebrate their friend's birthday. cool innit? ^_^ and.. i have a sudden urge to get a pair of specs and go parading around as a nerd.. ah. im weird. okay
tired
byebye

GOOD NEWS! and VERY BAD NEWS. good: MY MUM'S HOME, SHE CAN SEND ME TO BALLET. WHEE. bad: IM DOWN WITH A RUNNY NOSE. argh. cant pirouette, cant do grande jetes, i'll be sniffing the entire lesson or stuff a tissue up my nose, and i definately wont be able to dance. argh. argh. IM PISSED. i wish i could slap my immune system, its just so bloody weak. *but thats bcus i havent been taking care of myself..* ARGH. WHY NOW? >.<
ive been sick for a LONG time (sick= minor cough, sore throat, runny nose, cold, flu, fever, headaches, aches, gastric, cramps, giddiness, and alot more, just that its only MINOR, so its not a big deal..) , but today it just became more major. headache in the morning, and running nose now. ARGH. i just hope i dont suddenly jump into a state of FEVER.. IM SO FRUSTRATED I CAN RIP ALL MY HAIR OFF. but obviously i wont do that, its just a statement. okay. shall get ready to go. *sneeze* BLESS ME.

... hello. i'm still dead tired, so forgive me if this post is crap. i don't know why i'm so tired, since i slept right after i came back from ballet and bathed. which was like ten-something pm. its not really that late.. rehearsal last night was OKAY, ms lee finally got on focus, and she knows what she wants for this dance, and she's finishing it up on monday. good. then she says she'll start the second dance. FINALLY.. last night was the first night i sweated at rehearsal. and gosh, she gave me one of the most confusing parts. out of the whole SENIOR category, there are two sub-categories, juniors and seniors. the juniors are the lower grade ones (PREVIOUSLY grade sevens), and the seniors (of the seniors) are the higher grade ones (PREVIOUSLY grade eight). and supposedly im a junior. BUT, she gave me a senior part in the beginning and put me right in front. so after dancing for a while i have to run back to my original junior position. gosh. damn confusing lor. natasha's life is easier, she's been upgraded to a full senior, since ms lee put her with the seniors already. cool. good for her, at least she can get a more 'standing out' part.. i'm quite okay with my half junior, half senior position..
woke up this morning with the weirdest dream. it gave me a throbbing headache. but of course i didnt wail and moan and complain, since ines was sleeping with me, and i didnt want to wake her up. so i was just biting my lip to make sure i didnt start making noise. ow. my headache's gone now.. but it might come back anytime, so i had better don't be hyper today. >.<
yesterday afternoon i was busy.. SEWING. surprisingly. i finally decided to start sewing up my pointe shoes. *ah. i havent done the most difficult part, which is sewing something onto the TIP of the pointe shoe, which is the uber hard part. with my first pair, i broke four needles trying to sew it.. and i got most of my fingers bleeding severely.* and.. halfway through sewing the ribbons on, my mum brought me out.. to get ANOTHER pair of pointes for my intermediate foundation exam in september.. and i just freaked out.. bcus it meant another load of sewing for me to do. i aint the best seamstress there ever is, but my sewing skills are enough to get me by, enough to make sure my shoes dont fall apart even with the active dancing and jumping about. but it is alot of hard work you know..
i don't really have much to blog about, since it's only early in morning. i have to get to ballet by myself later *hmph. why....* cause my mum's taken the car to work. haix. working on a sunday. causing herself less rest and causing all of us difficulty travelling since we dont have the car. actually, its only me who's doing the travelling while my dad, ines and shaun slack at home. O_O BUT STILL. working on sundays isnt a good thing. sunday= slack day.
ah. shall go and watch shaun play his ps2. im bored. really.
CIAO.